There is a beautiful, quiet wisdom in George Washington's words about how we navigate our most personal relationships. At first glance, the idea of being courteous to everyone while keeping a small circle of intimacy might seem a bit cold, but when I sit with this thought, I see it as a way to protect our inner peace. It is about practicing kindness as a default setting for the world, while treating our deepest vulnerabilities like precious gems that only a trusted few should ever hold. It is not about building walls to shut people out, but rather about building gates that only open for those who have proven they can handle our hearts with care.

In our everyday lives, this balance is much harder to maintain than it sounds. We live in a world that often encourages us to overshare, to perform our lives on social media, and to seek instant validation from everyone we meet. We feel this pressure to be 'open' to everyone, yet we often find ourselves feeling drained or betrayed when we give our deepest secrets to people who haven't earned them. True intimacy requires a foundation of trust that is built slowly, through consistency, shared struggles, and time. It is a slow dance of getting to know someone's character through their small actions before you hand them the key to your soul.

I remember a time when I felt a great need to be understood by everyone in my extended circle. I was going through a difficult season and found myself pouring my heart out to acquaintances, hoping for a certain kind of support. But instead of feeling comforted, I felt exposed and strangely lonely. It wasn't until I leaned into a much smaller group—friends who had stood by me through much darker days—that I found the true safety I was looking for. Those few people had been 'well tried' by the passage of time and the weight of shared experiences. They didn't need me to perform; they just needed me to be.

As you move through your week, I want to encourage you to look at your inner circle with gentle intention. You can be the warmest, most polite version of yourself to your neighbors, your colleagues, and your distant relatives, spreading kindness wherever you go. But please, do not feel guilty about keeping your deepest vulnerabilities reserved for those who have truly earned your trust. Take a moment today to appreciate the few people who have proven their loyalty, and perhaps send them a small note of gratitude just to let them know they are held in your heart.